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As far as I know the default theme in 1.5 is not Metal, but Ocean, which is the blue-ish type you probably see in the latest Netbeans. Metal was a specific 1.4 l&f.
Of course another good theme site for Java is: http://www.javootoo.com/
Overall I think the Java UI is improving quite a bit, Ocean doesn't look half as bad as Metal, and a lot of the native skins are fairly good.