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For Unix-like systems you should have two versions: on for KDE4 and another for GNOME3. Installing full versions of these environments will give the idea of how the app for each of them should look like. In GNOME's case looking at design wiki would also be useful, as this environment is currently in transition. The rest of WM/DE landscape members are not attempting at consistency, so they are not your target auditory.
Yeah, I will start with Gnome and KDE (perhaps also a Unity interface). But it would be really awesome to also integrate with E17 for example and other exotic environments.
It's easy for me to look at these environments and try to mimic them but I know that for an application to actually feel like it's a part of the environment one needs to heavily use it for an extended period of time, to really learn those small details.
In short, I want tips on how I should make my KDE 4 version feel like a part of KDE 4 and not a third party application. Since I haven't used KDE 4 much I need tips from users of KDE 4. I need the dream interface, the vision.
E17 would be fine, but it isn't ready yet, so you may come back to it later. Still, I'm not quite sure they offer some substantial degree of consistency anyway, so you can target a generic idea of lightweight UI for E17, FXCE and WMs with no DEs to establish consistent look and feel.